Thursday, August 20, 2009

Rankings Are Out. (47 < 50 < 102)

US News and World Report, the magazine that seemingly runs the educational system in this country, has released its oft debated rankings of the best universities in the country. The great University of Florida is the only SEC school in the top tier (top 50), coming in at 47, up 2 spots from last year. Florida has remained, to the best of my knowledge, around 48 or 49 for the past 6-8 years, so this is an improvement, if slight.

I'm sure you're all dying to know how those people who chose poorly upon coming out of high school fared. Good. I like that about you. That's why you did well to go to Gainesville and why you're likely doing well in life, it's that competitive Gator spirit (or that superiority complex that all nongators say about Gators). The University of Miami, also known as the University of Jersey Kids came in at 50, cracking the top tier for the first time in their pathetic history. Florida State University came in at a shockingly bad 102. I don't even want to rip on FSU because they are a public institution and exist to serve the people of Florida. It's a shame that they should be ranked so low, but, as I mentioned below, Florida's education system is horrifyingly underfunded, ranked 49/50, coming in second to Lousiana in per capita dollars spent on their university system (I think).

The in-state tuition for the University of Florida is $4,373.00, making it the cheapest tuition in the country, while being the nation's fourth largest institution. Consider that for a moment. The state of Florida has no state income tax and yet still manages to produce a top echelon education for a bargain price. SunTan U, by comparison, will cost a rich white kid's parents $36,168.00 per year so their son Caleb or daughter Meadow can party on SoBe blowing coke and/or their bridge and tunnel friends, and yet they still will be second best to a school which costs 1/8th of the price. It's all about the U.

Some interesting facts about your alma mater.
  • For the first-year students that enrolled at UF in 2008, the median SAT score is 1240 - 1410, and the Median GPA was 4.1 - 4.4.
  • The freshmen retention rate of 94 percent is among the highest in the U.S.
  • UF admitted 1,049 International Baccalaureate students for the 2004-2005 academic year - more than any other university in the world.
  • Faculty awards include a Fields Medal (means they're very good at math), two Pulitzer Prizes, NASA's top award for research, and Smithsonian Institution's conservation award.
  • There are currently more than 60 Eminent Scholar chairs, and nearly 60 faculty elections to the National Academy of Sciences, Engineering, or Arts and Sciences, the Institute of Medicine or a counterpart in a foreign nation.
  • UF ranked 15th in the U.S. News and World Report "Top Public Universities" (2009); fourth in The Scientist magazine's "Best Places to Work in Academia" (2005); fifth among all universities in Kiplinger's magazine "Top 100 Public Colleges" (2003).
  • Milken Institute named UF one of the top-five U.S. institutions in the transfer of biotechnology research to the marketplace (2006).
  • Some 50 biotechnology companies have resulted from faculty research programs.
  • UF consistently ranks among the top-10 universities in licensing. Royalty and licensing income includes the glaucoma drug Trusopt, the sports drink Gatorade, and the Sentricon termite elimination system.
  • UF was awarded $518.8 million in sponsored research in 2005-2006. Research includes diverse areas such as health care and citrus production (the world's largest citrus research center).
  • In 2002, UF began leading six other universities under a $15 million NASA grant to work on a variety of space-related research during a five-year period.
  • UF began a partnership with Spain in 2000, to create the world's largest telescope in the Canary Islands. It is completed and you can read about CanariCam here.
  • For every dollar appropriated to the University of Florida, a total economic impact of eight dollars is spent within the state. Student spending supports local and statewide businesses and tourism.
  • UF is a major employer, with more than 35,000 employees.
  • The University of Florida contributes nearly $6 billion annually to Florida's economy and is responsible for nearly 75,000 jobs. UF is one of the largest research universities in the nation.
  • UF became the first university in the world to be designated a "Certified Audubon Cooperative Sanctuary" (2005) for environmental and wildlife management, resource conservation, waste management, and outreach and education.
  • UF is one of three universities to be the first in the country to offer an Organic Agriculture undergraduate degree program (2006).
  • Fresh Food Co., located in the Broward Dining Center, serves local fruits and vegetables for the benefit of product freshness and to support local commerce, as well as reduce transportation, fuel and packaging costs.
  • A school-record 12 Gator athletic teams turned in top-10 finishes in 2007-08, marking the seventh consecutive year that 10 or more Gator athletic teams finished among the nation's top 10. Those finishes propelled Florida to sixth in the 2007-08 Sports Academy Directors' Cup standings. Only Florida and UCLA appear in the top 10 in each of the last 25 national all-sports rankings.
  • Florida's 89 percent graduation success rate (GSR) of athletes reported by the NCAA in 2007 makes UF one of only three programs in the 2007-08 NACDA National All-Sports top 10 to post a GSR above 85%.
  • Florida's 2008-2009 National Champion Football team had a 100% graduation rate.
  • And finally, the most important of them all: The ratio of women to men is 54:46. Fuckin' A.
Go rank.
Go Gators.

2 comments:

Caro said...

This report fails to mention among its prestigious alumni, Marcos Javier Garcia-Allen, blogger extraordinaire!!

JEWBOY said...

Here! Here!
One of the best pieces you have written. Not pre-game natty good, but right up there.

By the way, first gatorade and now Wendy's? Fat hydrated athletes all over the nation should be singing our praises.